31 May 2004

searing pain

Skin burning.

Not from anger or passion or even a long dip in a hot spa or a steaming shower.

Oh no.

Skin burning from damage, from the sun searing down on my flesh for 5 hours...without due sunscreen.

Nearly every inch of my body aching, burning - like needles of fire pricking my skin all over my body.

Can't wear a t-shirt, it sticks to the masacred skin. Can't wear pants - they chaffe the tattered nerves warning my brain to be careful, because THIS HURTS!

PJ's and my bathrobe - you are my only salvation.

Feeling more and more pathetic with each new section of my body that I discover is burnt.

Leg, back, stomach - what am I going to do? How can I just sit here and do my homework.

Can't open the windows for fresh air - can't let the world see me like this, so pathetic - so in pain.

Not able to sit down, to lean back, to lie in my bed and whimper.

Too much burning - and too much to do.

Red like a lobster - head to toe, front to back, every inch of my un-sunscreened skin.

Slathering aloe vera on all of the burns, hoping that the pain will stop long enough to write my one-act play.

Oh, what am I going to do?

Can't sit still, can't concentrate, can't stop slathering my burns in handfulls of aloe.

It's the only thing that helps - the only aid that makes the pain stop for a while.

So miserable. So very much pain.

Red throbbing all over - hot searing, flesh feeling like its separating itself from the bone; like the nerves are pulling away from their place.

Every inch of me rifled with agony...

Oh how I hate long days at the beach when I think I'd like to get a tan...

Oh how I hate sunburns that burn like fire all over your body.

Oh how I hate being thusly clad.

-RK

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